Have you ever wondered what goes into writing a memoir that captures the hearts of readers? Let's explore into the backstory of how my equestrian memoir Horses Adored and Men Endured came to be. Whether you are looking for your next light-hearted read or you have aspirations to write your own book one day, this blog post will hopefully inspire you.
Inspiration Gallops Away with Me
It all started with a love for horses and and a series of outlandishly terrible dates. As a single gal living in Southern California in the late 90s, dating did not come easy for me. I had a great teaching job, a wonderful community of friends and a charming horse, my Thoroughbred DC, but I wanted to meet someone special. It was evident this Mr. Right was not a middle school student (ew), nor was he a horseman at my barn (because there were not men at the farm that I recall).
As I started "putting myself out there" and going on several dates back at the dawn of online dating, the humor of it all kept me going. Humor and hope.
CLICK HERE to get your own signed copy of Horses Adored and Men Endured
Story Starters and Community Feedback
I thought writing a book would be a cool thing--just for the sake of saying I had written a book. So I took a memoir writing class at Vroman's, a wonderful indie bookstore in Pasadena. The first week our prompt was to write "an uncomfortable truth." The small group nature of the class and reading our work and giving honest feedback was so cool! I loved it. I had never experienced that kind of collaboration before.
One of the horse stories I shared was about my early days as a rider--meandering through my best friend's dad's apple orchard aboard a palomino pinto mare. From atop her back I could reach out and grab a golden delicious apple and eat it while marching through the green lane bordered by trees.
When I read that particular piece to the class, they were interested. No one was a horse person and my tale of riding down the apple orchard rows, eating apples, and throwing the cores over my shoulder drew them in. "They like it," I thought, wondering if it would resonate with fellow horse lovers too.
The Writing Marathon: Ten Years to Publication
I began writing other horse-themed or dating-themed essays until I had over twenty of them. The organization scheme emerged. My goal was to alternate a bad date story with a funny horse story. The chronology was mostly from youth to young adulthood.
This part of writing the overall story was probably the most rigorous and took me years. Yes, years. A decade to be precise.
I started writing my first few chapters around 2008, and I finally published Horses Adored and Men Endured in 2018!
"Susan, why did it take so long?" you might be wondering. Well, I had a full-time job as a middle school teacher, a horse, and I had to learn how the publishing world works. I learned that it wasn't just enough to have a unique idea and well-written manuscript, but that I would have to find a literary agent to represent me. That agent would pitch my work to publishers and perhaps one of them would bite.
To make a long story short, I got an agent, she loved the story, she tried for a year to sell it but was unsuccessful. The feedback we received was essentially "too niche."
All throughout this time I was writing on my own blog Saddle Seeks Horse and for various equine media outlets. I was "in" those "too niche" places already. I knew readers were out there. So in true horse girl "you can't stop me" spirit, I spent the next year or so learning the ropes of self-publishing (after a rejection from a niche equestrian publishing house that didn't publish memoir--at least not when I queried them).
The Publication Finish Line
Finally, Horses Adored and Men Endured was ready to meet the world. After having found and worked with an editor, an interior formatter, a cover designer and sending it to beta readers, I had all the pieces necessary to make my book dream come true.
Side note: one of the trickiest things after the book writing marathon was crafting the back cover copy and the sales page copy. It seemed a lot easier to write a 60,000 word book than to summarize the overall story into just a few compelling lines of copy!
This copy below was a doozy to come up with. lol
In Conclusion
Horses Adored was met with praise, with readers describing it as a fun beach read that tugged at their heartstrings. An excerpt of Horses Adored was published in Horse Illustrated magazine, there were positive reviews in Horse & Style and UnTacked.
A recent 5-star review said this:
"Horses Adored and Men Endured by Susan Friedland is a light, breezy, humorous look on a horse-crazy woman's love affair with horses and her misadventures in dating. As a memoir, it is great fun while at times quite harrowing - Friedland is frank in her retellings which lets the reader into all the less-enjoyable bits of her experiences. Example: pulling that gauze out of her nose after her rhinoplasty sounded PAINFUL!"
(The rhinoplasty was painful. lol)
Writing a memoir is no easy feat, but the journey of creating "Horses Adored and Men Endured" was a labor of love. From inspiration to publication, every step was challenging, but not insurmountable. Over the years I've had many many people ask me for advice how to publish their first book. I launched my first online writers course Aspiring Author Jumpstart to fast track fellow writers from story idea to publication. There's no need for the publishing process to take you ten years! lol
Actually, since January 2024, one of my students, Joyce, has completed her first manuscript which is now with an editor. She plans to publish the book before the end of this year! I'm so excited for her.
If like Joyce, you also have a book inside you just waiting to meet readers, please join Aspiring Author Jumpstart.
The next round of this small group Zoom class begins September 26. We'd love to have you if you too have a book in you just waiting to meet readers. CLICK HERE for more details. Or send me an email at Susan at saddleseekshorse dot com.
